idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
