yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
