Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
