is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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