I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
