We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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