Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
