so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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