My brain says no but my pants say off.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Randomize