TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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