Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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