I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
