She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
