we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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