My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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