A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
