Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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