i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
we made out on top of his cat.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
