Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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