in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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