dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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