Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
