Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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