come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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