Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
