Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
