Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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