Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
