No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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