me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
He better not be in your backpack
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize