as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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