i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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