Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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