On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
