Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
