So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
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