I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
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