just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Life without a bra equals bliss.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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