when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
