My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
