Well douche your snatch and let's go!
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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