You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
