I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize