I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
me + whiskey = a bad person
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
