You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
