Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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