I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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