the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
