we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
i believe in u and ur pee
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
