Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
